Sunday, July 6, 2008

Everybody Votes Channel - Results

Ever had a craving for some rotten fish? You know, not sushi, but something nice and rotted. No? Well, this week we found out that there are some people who act on that craving and can’t get enough. Oh ya, also that EVC voters are a bunch of liars (ok, we knew that already).

Are you ambidextrous?
Yes (24.5%) or No (75.5%)

We seriously doubt that 25% of people are able to use their left and right hands equally, even if they’re Wii users who practice with their Nunchaku every day. Get real. Most likely 80 percent of those pink people didn’t know what ambidextrous even means. From all the statistics we could find on the internet the real statistic is probably more like 1 to 5 percent of people – so it would truly be incredible if the American EVC population is so skilled!

Lesson Learned: Mono-dexterity is a given!

In an elevator, do you stare at the floor numbers or at others?
Display of floor numbers (66.9%) At others (33.1%)

How rude, seriously. Of course they don’t mean getting into an elevator and facing inward from the door and staring everyone down – only people doing sociology experiments are that rude. I think people took this question to mean that they “people watch” while in an elevator. You might as well do something productive with your time - especially if it’s a long ride. Staring, however, is a really strong word that tends to invoke feelings of creepy awkwardness.

Lesson learned: Next time you’re in an elevator, turn around, someone might be watching you!

If it’s a warm, sunny day outside, would you view this with  . . .
Optimism (79.6%) Pessimism (20.4%)

Didn’t they already do a glass half full or empty question? And could this question be any longer and more specific? What if it’s warm but not too sunny, or kind of hazy, or warm but later in the evening, then what? So basically this question is trying to ask a question that wouldn’t be very politically correct in a roundabout way: “are you a vampire?” Nintendo is very clever, never underestimate the Nintendo.

Lesson learned: Answer weird questions about the weather to be included in secret market research studies!

(World Poll) At mealtime, which are you more particular about?
Amount (19.7%) or Taste (80.3%)

Isn’t it funny how everyone craps all over the taste of food in England and they end up being 2nd on the list of countries that could give a crap about the taste of food? And what the hell are they eating over in Iceland anyway? Oh yea… sheep heads, rotten shark, ram testicles, seal flippers, and rotten stingray, yum!? Obviously taste isn’t an issue in that country. We also enjoy the fact that males care more about amount than taste – are we really so uncivilized? Perhaps a bit.

Lesson learned: Hákarl, Thorláksmessa, and Þorramatur – oh my!

Another week another set of crazy factoids we have ingested into our brainholes thanks to the EVC. Check back next week for more tidbits of EVC goodness!

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