Sunday, August 10, 2008

Everybody Votes Channel - Results

Random results. Do they bother you? They bother us! Well, not really, but this week the results maps were so polka-dotted that it made us scratch our heads and wonder what was going on. Can you figure it out? Read on.

How many books have you read in the last year?
Ten or fewer (51.8%) or More than ten (48.2%)
Wait, what? What’s a book? Hold on while we look this up. OK, so according to the Wikipedia entry: a book is a set or collection of written, printed, illustrated, or blank sheets, made of paper, parchment, or other material, usually fastened together to hinge at one side. So once again we are at a loss, what is paper or parchment? Paper is thin material mainly used for writing upon, printing upon or packaging. Thanks Wikipedia! Allrighty, so apparently you can write or print words on this paper substance and then glue it together and it becomes a book – radical. Insane!
Apparently quite a few states are in to this whole “reading books” thing: Washington, Idaho, Utah, Colorado, Minnesota, Iowa, Wisconsin, Kansas, Arkansas, Mississippi, Alabama, Virginia, Maryland, Vermont, Rhode Island, and Alaska. Whew, that was a mouthful. Now not all of these states are synonymous with well read learned individuals, eh? Perhaps some of these states just don’t have the internet, or they have bad eyesight, or they’re afraid of getting bad eyesight, or in the case of Colorado – they think it’s hip to read books! Either way, these results were very interesting just because they ended up being so varied and random.
Lesson Learned: Females are silly. Really.
I give my pets . . .
People names (46.1%) or Silly names (53.9%)
Here we go with the names again! So now it’s pretty much confirmed that people call other people by real names and call animals by silly names. But wait, another map of randomness! Turns out that people in North Dakota, Nebraska, Missouri, Arkansas, Louisiana, Vermont, and Maine like to call their pets Tim, Steve, Jenny, and Sarah. Why are those particular states more likely to call their pets by “regular” names? Just like the last map this map is so random.
Lesson Learned: There’s a conspiracy here and we are gonna get to the bottom of it!
Which would you rather have each year?
One long vacation (38.0%)or Multiple short vacations (62.0%)
What? No random pink states to throw off the statistics and map? Hey, wait a minute, let’s look a little bit closer… is that some pink in Puerto Rico?! And look at this: Arkansas, New York, Connecticut, Rhode Island, Alaska, and possibly DC are light green!  These places like long vacations just a little bit more than everyone else, especially people in PR. Well, people in PR have to fly somewhere every time they go somewhere so obviously the annoyance of potentially dying in a tin can is only worth doing once a year. What about the other light-green-maybe-almost-pink-but-not-quite states? Who knows. Seriously. Why couldn’t this map be random like the other 2 to give us something to theorize about, eh?
Lesson Learned: Flying sucks!
Apparently there was no conspiracy, because as you know – conspiracies come in threes; only two of this week’s three results had the randomly nonsensical maps. Oh well, there’s always next week. Besides, if all three maps had come out looking like alphabet soup it would have been the cause of us losing sleep over why the results had been the way they were – instead we’re perfectly happy to just toss it up to the fact that random results happen. Hopefully it was educational all the same. Till next week!

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